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Registering For University Classes Sucks!

I feel like I haven't written on here in a while.  Today was a very frustrating day.  I had to register for classes for the Fall 2010 semester.  Everything was fine until I went to register for one class in particular.  For some reason the COMM 302 class that I wanted to register for wasn't allowing me to.  I called the head of the department, but he told me to call back next week.  As of right now there's 9 spots left out of 25.  Yeah...  If I call back next week there's not going to be any spots left.  I NEED to be in that class.  I already have so much longer before I graduate because I waited a long time to choose my major and because I took a year off.  I have at least 2 years left if I get in all the classes I need.  At the rate this is going I might not get into this class.

The head of the department, Dr. Mendez-Mendez, told me that maybe if it filled up they would open up another section.  The only problems I see with this is A) he said "maybe" and B) what happens if the section they open and it doesn't fit into my schedule.  Anyways, to say the least, I wasn't very happy.  I ended up calling a ton of people to try and get into the class.  I called my advising centre, my advisor, the registrar, and the teacher who is going to teach the class.  Unfortunately the teacher, Professor Pudlinski, who is teaching the class, wasn't in his office, so I could only leave a message.  In the end, I was told the only two people who could possibly override me were Dr. Mendez-Mendez or Professor Pudlinski.

After talking to all those people and talking to my Mum, we decided it would be best if I drove down to University and talked to Dr. Mendez-Mendez or Professor Pudlinski in person.  When I got to the Communication Department, neither of them were there.  I waited, and waited, and waited.  I talked to 2 other professors as well and no one could get me into the class.  In the end, I was in the Communication Office for almost 3 hours and I'm still not in the class.

I'm SO frustrated with the university.  Previously, my adviser had told me that the University was criticize for not having good advising for students.  Now I know exactly why.  This is absolutely ABSURD that I am still not in this class.  There is NO reason at all why I shouldn't be able to register for this class.  I was able to register for one that is exactly the same last year, but for some reason this year I can't.  I'm just really fed up with the whole situation.  I'm going to try to call again tomorrow, but I have a feeling no one will be there who will actually be able to help me.

I guess that's it for now since I'm watching TV, so I kind of distracted.  I have to finish painting my nails as well.  I bought myself a new nail polish as a reward for such a frustrating day haha.  Anyways I'll try to write again soon. 

Productive Days!

Today felt like a fairly productive day for me which is always good I guess.  I went to work and was supposed to work from 5-9 but of course we ran over that time.  A few people got to leave, but the manager asked me if I could say and I didn't have an excuse as to why I couldn't so I just said yes.  I ended up staying there until 12.  I suppose the money will be better when the pay check comes, but I'm tired after a 7 hour shift!

The thing that annoyed me about having to stay was because I stayed 7 hours you're required to take a 30 minute lunch break.  I didn't break a lunch.  This resulted in me having to go to Atlanta Bread to get something to eat.  I ended up getting a sausage, egg and cheese on a croissant.  When I came home later to track my calories on SparkPeople, I ended up find out exactly how many calories were in this.  Long story short... almost 700 calories... Erm... yeah...  This definitely made me go over my calorie intake for the day.  I did walk a lot more at work, so I probably burned more calories than I normally do just sitting around, but still.  I'm a little mad about it.  I mean there's nothing I can do now really.  I've already decided I'm having salad for dinner so I don't just tack on more and more calories by eating something higher in calories for dinner.  I guess now I know not to get a sausage, egg and cheese from Atlanta Bread!

Besides work, I called CCSU to see if my status had been activated yet for the Fall 2010 semester.  They said it was, so this means I can register for classes.  In order to register I need to get my PIN number from my adviser at CCSU.  I called his office and he picked up, so I started explaining the reason why I had called and he COMPLETELY cut me off and was like "I'm in the middle of something, call back in an hour."  I just said okay and then said bye.  I was a little mad though.  The way he said it was very rude and, honestly, I feel like if you're in the middle of something THAT important that you can't answer my simple question then you probably shouldn't have picked up your phone?  Maybe that's just my opinion, but yeah.  I'd rather have left a message than have it pick up to tell me to call in an hour...

I haven't called back yet because it hasn't been an hour yet, but I did call my OBGYN to tell them to send me my bill for a January appointment I had because I changed insurance.  When I called they told me the bill had already been paid.  I was a little worried, so I called my work and the human resources woman, Georgette, told me that I was all set.  So I guess I don't have to worry about it.  The dentist also told my Mum I was all set for January, so the only person I'm waiting to hear back from is Elaine.  I left her a message today as well asking about her sending the bill to my house.  I'm not sure if she's already sent the bill and the insurance paid it or not, but I guess I'll find out when she calls back.

Other than that my day has been pretty uneventful.  It's Lauren's birthday but she's not even around.  My Dad isn't around either I guess.  He told her he couldn't see her because he was in New York.  To be honest, I think that's pretty shitty to tell your daughter you can't see her on her birthday because you're too busy 3 hours away having a day to yourself.  I feel like birthdays are the one day where it's basically all about you.  To have someone tell you they can't see you because they're too busy doing fun stuff for the themselves is a bit hurtful.  At least I would be hurt...

I think I might go watch the last Lord Of The Rings film because I finally finished the last book and have nothing better to do.  I'll definitely have to write again tomorrow.  I'm hoping tomorrow I can stay within my calorie intake a range... or at least do better than today.

Jesus! Family!

Today was an... interesting day.  Yesterday my Mum, my Grandmother and I started painting my bedroom because we're moving.  Today was the day we put on the second coat to finish all the painting.  I love my Grandmother and all but gosh did she get on my nerves today.  I know she's trying to help, but she just has to touch everything! and move everything!  Even if I say what I'm gonna do with something she'll try to move it and put it somewhere else.

For example, I said I was going to wash my sheets today.  She started to make my bed and move all my covers around and put comforters in my clothes, so I told her again that I was gonna wash them so she shouldn't bother making my bed, but she wouldn't listen.  She doesn't seem to listen!  Ever!  She always thinks what she's doing is right, so if someone says otherwise, it doesn't matter because her way is right.  I'm not the only one who thinks this.  My Aunt and my Mum also agree strongly.

I just wanted to vent a little bit.  She makes me very stressed out when she's here and starts moving all my stuff around.  I really, really do understand she wants to help, but if I tell her what I'm going to do with something, there's a reason why I'm saying it.  I don't need her to do something else with it.  Just leave it be!  Ugh!!!

Also, she feels the need to always tell me to go do certain stuff.  She told my Aunt she couldn't believe that me and my Sister didn't help out my Mum.  It's not like she lives her everyday and sees whether or not we help her out.  I really do help my Mum out, probably more than she thinks.  To be accused of never helping out because the time that she comes over I don't do much is very frustrating.  I think I just have a short fuse lately with her?  I don't ever remember her being like this when I was younger, but lately she just gets on my nerves in about a minute.

I just can't wait for her to leave.  I know this probably all sounds very mean and ungrateful, but I don't mean for it to come off that way at all.  I'm just very irritated.  Maybe because it's almost "that time of the month" but still.  Sheesh!

Now that I've gotten that out, onto what I ate today.  I did fairly well today so far.  Although I came home from work and had a bowl of cereal which probably wasn't something I should have had, but it's fine because I am still within my calorie intake for the day.  I'm not sure why but I just felt really hungry.  I also ended up eating the last of my Easter candy.  I had one miniature chocolate bunny, 4 peeps and one Cadbury egg.  Obviously NONE of these are healthy, but I really have no will power.  Even though Jillian says there's no such thing and that if it's there you'll eat it.  Maybe I'm the perfect model of that idea.

I haven't eaten dinner yet, but I'm going to have left over ham from Easter and some sort of vegetable, not sure which kind yet though.

I guess I feel a little better now that I've written in my journal.  It kind of clears my head.  That might change once my Grandmother tells me to do something else, but for now I feel a little better.

Emotional Eating?

I've decided I'm going to try to write each day on my blog.  Even if it's something short and simple about what happened during my day.  Obviously I would write more if something big occurred in my life and I wanted to write it all down to sort it all out on "paper."

I have started going on SparkPeople again.  I feel like lately I've just been sort of "letting myself go."  I haven't really had any motivation and haven't made any effort to try and loose weight or eat healthy or exercise.  It's been pretty bad.  I eat a lot of crap all day and then end up with heartburn which keeps me up at night.  Yet for some reason I continue to punish myself and do it again.  I'm not sure why either.  I just want to break this viscous cycle and feel better.  I know I feel loads better when I am eating healthy and exercising and all of that, so why don't I do?  Who knows.

On SparkPeople I did reset some of my goals.  Some of the new ones that I made were:

- Don't drink soda

- Go for a walk

- Write in a journal

As far as my ultimate weight loss goal I put to be 130 pounds by December 25, 2010.  That gives me until Christmas to loose all the weight I want.  Which reminds me, just to put it out there... I weighed myself the other day and the scale said 181.5.  I have a long way to go, but I really wanna do this.  I'm sick of treating myself the way I do now.  I would feel so much better and I know I would, but I feel like I just LOVE food.  I can't seem to say no to eating sweets and stuff that's bad for me.  It doesn't help that Lauren and my Mum always seem to bring that type of food home.  I'm really trying hard to not eat the stuff that they bring back but it's really hard.  Jillian said there's no such thing as willpower and if it's there you'll eat it.  Ultimately that's what ends up happening to me.  I try and I tell myself I'm not going to eat any, but somehow I always manage to mess that up.  I've thought about trying to keep more food in the fridge in my room so I don't always have to go into the kitchen and see all the crappy food they've brought home.  Maybe that'll be a little better.

Sometimes I feel like it's hard to plan what I want to eat the day before.  It's not the planning that's actually hard it's the fact that I choose what I'm gonna eat and then sometimes something will come up and my Mum won't want that or she'll bring home something.  Then I get thrown off.  I'm not trying to make up a ton of excuses either.  This is just the way I feel.  I feel like if I had a set schedule that was the same everyday then it'd be a lot easier.  A routine is what I need.  It just becomes so hard because the mornings that I go to work at 5am my whole schedule feels off.  Even if I did find a routine that worked with my 5am wake up call I wouldn't want to do it everyday.  Who wants to get up at 4am on their days off?  Probably not many people.  I understand maybe you would get more used to it after a while, but I'm just not sure I'm a big fan of the whole idea.  Hopefully I can figure something out.

Besides that nothing is really new.  I've been coming down with a cold, but besides that things are good.  I'm kind of sad Courtney went back to RI.  I really liked hanging out with her when she was home.  Hopefully I can see her again soon.

I guess that's it for now, but I'll write again tomorrow and hopefully it'll be all good things!

Success!

I'm still working hard on eating right and exercising this week. I went to the gym today and worked out for around 45 minutes, which I'd consider good. I think in the past I've always tried to dive right in and go to the gym 9725925 hours a week right away. I feel like I need to take my time and work up to the recommended 4 to 5 hours a week in the gym. I plan on going to the gym again on Saturday, so that's 2 days this week. Unlike before where I wasn't going at all... Baby steps :)

I think I'm doing well so far though. I weighed myself today and I weigh 173.5 according to our scale at home. I know that the scale at work will add about 2.5 pounds or so. I definitely know to expect the number to be higher at the weigh in on Monday, but that's ok because I know so far I've tried really hard this week. As a reward, if I follow everything this week to a T, I am going to get a hoodie that I really want at Old Navy. Originally I wasn't sure if it was a good reward for only a week of following my diet plan, but I had written down, go see a movie, as a weekly reward, which ends up being about the same price as the hoodie, so I figure it's ok as a weekly reward. Especially since it's my first week. I'm hoping this will motivate me to keep going. I feel really good about it.

Besides that, I went to see Elaine today. Everything was pretty good. I just need to figure out what I'm doing about health insurance for the next 6 months. The Aetna plan I originally was going to apply for doesn't cover mental health benefits, so basically the two most important doctors I need to go to wouldn't be covered... Problem! So I have to either find another plan under Aetna that does cover mental health benefits or go under my Mom's health insurance at work, which is more expensive.

The whole health insurance thing is just really confusing all together and I think I'm getting a headache just from looking at the computer screen for so long, so I think I'm gonna go now!

Hello 2010!

It's a new year! Obviously I haven't written in a long, long time! Stuff has been crazy lately, but I'm back at home now. I decided to withdrawal from university for the fall semester and I'll be taking the spring semester off as well. I really just need the time to figure out what I want to do with my life. I still have no idea. I'm going back to university in the fall 2010, so as of right now I thinking about getting a degree in international studies.

Hm... Yeah... I'm not sure how hard that's gonna be. I really feel like I need to talk to the department and ask how intense of a degree this is. I'm just not sure if I can do it or if I'll end up just getting lazy and not working hard enough and end up in the same position I am now. Granted, I feel a lot better now than I did last semester, so that's a good thing :)

I'm also trying to loose weight. I read "Master Your Metabolism" by Jillian Michaels. It was a good book, just A LOT to take in all at once. I only took it out from the library so I couldn't keep it for myself to refer back to later. I guess the most basic gist of the book is that you should eat whole, organic foods. Like Jillian says in the book, "don't eat it unless it comes from the ground or has a mother." Even though that sounds really weird, it's a good way of remember what you can and cannot eat.

Since I've finished "Master Your Metabolism" I went and got "Winning By Losing" by Jillian Michaels. For some reason she really inspires me to be better... to be healthy. I know I need to take care of myself. I know that what I've been doing, obviously, isn't working out for me. At this point in my life I feel like I'm trying to do the best job I can at taking care of myself. I really, REALLY need to stop worrying about what other people think and just worry about me and take care of myself in the best way possible.

With that said, I started a food diary today and I set goals and rewards for myself. I think that's something important that I didn't really bother to take any time to work on before. I mean I kind of always had an "ultimate" goal in mind of how I wanted to look or how I wanted to be, but now it's down on paper and I have monthly, weekly, and daily goals as well. I think rewards are a big part of my success as well. I know sometimes I feel guilty buying myself stuff, but I think if I succeed at my goals that I have written down, then maybe I deserve a little rewards? I didn't write down any HUGE or costly rewards... Just small things, like a new nail polish, or an episode of Glee, or even a new outfit at the end of the month.

I really hope that I can stick with this. I really, really want to loose the weight. I feel like it will help me in so many ways. It's just something I need to do for myself. I think part of the reason I haven't lost the weight yet is because it's just easier. It's easier to just eat the food that tastes good, but is super crappy for my body. It's easier just to not work hard and go to the gym and keep the weight. I know it's going to be really hard to loose 45 pounds, but in my mind, I know I can do it. Just like I know if I work really hard I can get a degree in international studies. It's just a matter of actually doing it. I know I can do it :)